This One Thing

I love the scene in the movie City Slickers where Billy Crystal's character, Mitch, is alone with Curly, played by Jack Palance. Curly is giving Mitch some life advice:

Curly: Do you know what the secret of life is? (holds up one finger) This.

Mitch: Your finger?

Curly: One thing. Just one thing. You stick to that and the rest don't mean s***.

Mitch: But what is the "one thing?"

Curly: That's what you have to find out.

What's your one thing?

Your job, your family, your church...there could be a variety of responses. Perhaps there could even be a number of answers within yourself as to what that "one thing" could me. Our days are inundated with activity, responsibilities, places to go, people to see, with leisure to fit in somewhere. In the midst of the swirling sea that "one thing" becomes blurred into "just these things."

Our examination of Christianity seems to simplify the answer to the question...at least on the surface for Christ-followers. "My one thing is God." The answer seems honorable and is politically correct for a religious-minded practitioner. Yet even for the average church-attender, "this one thing" can become uncertain. Is my one thing serving in the church or is it my attendance? Is my focus Bible study and my small group or is it giving my money in the offering? Is my one thing participating in weekend worship or is it delivering bags of food to the needy?

"Just one thing" again confuses the issue and has become "just these things."

Our lives take up the mantel to support our philosophical rational to religion by twirling multiple spiritual plates daily. More often than not, plates fall off now and then with a loud crash. We feel the guilt of failing in the eyes of God and quickly try to place even more plates upon the sticks, frantically twirling with new spiritual activity to please God. Our "one thing" is spinning as many spiritual tasks as possible to please God.

Meanwhile God softly whispers and asks us a question: "Do you know what the secret of life is? The secret is just one thing...and that one thing is listening to my heartbeat. It's being with me and experiencing my love and total acceptance. It's quieting sitting in my lap and feeling my arms around you rocking you gently. It's knowing me as your Daddy."

His whisper is not even heard because of my frantic spiritual plate-spinning. Busyness is priority as spiritual points are calculated by my being faithful. Doing has replaced being. The busier the better...God will then love and accept me more. I have got only one life to accumulate enough points for God to smile on me and for others to honor me. My "To-do List" is never completed and my "To-want List" is always looming in my mind. Gotta add more...gotta stay busy...

His whisper is now background noise...a murmur...an insignificant voice among louder shouts that lure me like a siren. The shouts are all I hear.

"Just one thing" has seemed to disappear.

But as the voices dissipate, in loving patience God appears...waiting...for me to rediscover "just one thing."

Daddy God

We rambled through airport security and eventually found ourselves sitting in the passenger section. As we looked at each other, the realization of our hopes and dreams was about to come true. Julie and I were on our way to Southern California to visit our son and his wife and our new granddaughter Isabella.

Our trip was a quick weekend filled with numerous fun activity and visits with Brittany's wonderful family. We had not seen our son and his wife for at least a couple of years since before his last Iraq deployment, so to just be together again was so invigorating for our hearts.

But the highlight of our weekend escape was little Isabella. What a precious gift to hold her, play with her, change her, feed her, bathe her, and carry her. This was our granddaughter and she was so precious and full of personality. One thing was apparent...she knew her Daddy well and felt right at home in his large Marine arms.

As I held that little child in my arms I couldn't help but ponder about how God as my "Daddy God" loves it when I am a child in His presence. As little Bella is right at home in the security of her Daddy's love, she is uninhibited about her feelings. There is no editing going on before her Daddy - when she wants something she expresses her feelings without thinking. I know...I witnessed it first hand! She is secure and knows Daddy cares and accepts her as she is, wet diaper, drool and anything else that leaks. Such openness before her Daddy is the desire of God for everyone of His children.

Brennan Manning writes that "emotions are our most direct experience of where we are in the moment." Yet when we grow older as Christians we become that "mature spiritual adult" who learns to edit before others and God. We spiritualize and hide as if we don't believe Daddy's promise to love us and hold us and take care of us. Little Bella sees her world through her father's eyes with a simplicity built upon absolute trust in her Daddy.

The Bible compares belief and the receiving of salvation as the faith of a little child. The same holds true in living the Godlife. When we recognize that God is everything and we are nothing but a little one that trusts and relies upon our Daddy, we stop becoming anxious and trying to be a controlling adult that works hard at maintaining masks of perception before others. We live by His promise of love and acceptance for who we really are, drool and all.

By the way, Isabella's name means, "God's promise." And her middle name of Elizabeth?

It also means "God's promise."

Today, I'm going to just sit in Daddy God's lap and enjoy a double dose of "God's promise."

The Royal Mask of Piety

It was a typical Sunday night. The air was warm and inviting to the people inside the building. In fact it seemed to call them like sirens to leave the enclosed confines and be baptised in the Spring sunset. But this was church and the people gathered were not only the committed...they were the committed religious. They resisted such temptations because they had an image to keep up and they had become the religious professionals. Their open gathering every Sunday night was held like a badge in the community evidencing that they were committed to God and proved that their devotional practice rose above the Sunday morning church attender. To God, they were the cream of the crop...faithful, studious, and devout practitioners of the letter of God's authoritative Word.

The usual assembly of familiar faces created a sense of comfortable acceptance and control. Everyone knew everyone...at least the religious faces they wore upon arrival. With a mask of worship and piety others admired them and God certainly looked upon them as the chosen ones. During the worship they proudly held their traditional hymnals and sang each song with a note of familiarity and pride...they were getting the words correct and even sang the parts with great harmony. They smiled at each other and felt right at home.

Then he walked in.

His more than casual clothing seemed irreligious. Doesn't he know that this is God's sanctuary and that His requirement was to wear our best? He walked in right off the street and then just sat in a pew by himself without a word. Chains from his pockets and tattoos seemed inappropriate and out of place. A leather coat and leather pants seemed at odds with the shirts, ties, and dresses of the faithful. The religious kept one eye on their hymnals and another on him. Their cross eyed facial expressions began to take the note of silent whispers among themselves about his identity and where he came from. To make matters even more fidgety, he was Hispanic. In an assembly of stayed white reformed middle age adults a twenty-something Hispanic carried a neon light that disturbed the religious air.

The looks continued but no one said a word to him.

The pastor started his sermon but no one was listening. The stares continued with a certain "nose direction" pointing upward. And then the pastor did the unthinkable...he started talking to the Hispanic man in the middle of his sermon. The night air became very thick and still and the religious piety feared for his life and their own. Could their be a gun or knife underneath those garments and chains? Please God protect him and us!

Now he is even making him stand out on the floor with him! He seems so irreligious and out of place...so common and unacceptable for such a place as this. Worry and uncomfortable tension cause the piety to sit wide-eyed and waiting.

He answers a question from the pastor and indicates that he is a missionary training to go to Mexico for full time ministry.

The smiles broaden across the crowd and the heads began to nod in religious approval. A collective "sigh" swung through the crowd as once again the piety felt at home in the sanctuary.

It's amazing how much love they showed him after the service was finally over!

The message from the pastor that night was on James 2:

If a man enters your church wearing an expensive suit, and a street person wearing rags comes in right after him, and you say to the man in the suit, "Sit here sir; this is the best seat in the house!" and either ignore the street person or say, "Better sit here in the back row," haven't you segregated God's children and proved that you are judges who can't be trusted? Listen, dear friends, isn't it clear by now that God operates quite differently? He chose the world's down-and-out as the kingdom's first class citizens with full rights and privileges. The kingdom is promised to anyone who loves God. (The Message)

As the pastor, I planted the man as an object lesson.

In our religiosity, we have forgotten the Royal Law of Love and assumed the Royal Mask of Piety.

I think God must be sick.

Lord of the Rings

Two rings. Each ring appears fairly similar in its visual presentation. The smooth round metal is simple and unobtrusive. One is silver and the other gold. while the silver ring is approaching 65 years of existence, the other lags behind but is no rookie at 29 years old. Each one has an original purpose to signify a marital contract of fidelity, commitment, and love.

The first ring my wife Julie gave to me 29 years ago in June. Although I've had it resized because of my "growing" finger girth, the ring remains perfectly intact. On the inside it reads, "JB to JZ June 26, 1981." That significant date was the time and moment Julie and I became one in marriage on a hot steamy day in Redding, California. The other ring is just as simple. There are no inscriptions on the inside but instead the memories of a wartime marriage of my mother and father in England, June 8, 1945 linger on. In a world at that time consumed by fear and war, love prevailed. I lost my father 15 years ago and recently my mother gave me his ring. I had it resized last year and now wear it on the pinkie finger of my right hand.

Two rings. One on my left hand marital finger and the other on my right hand pinkie finger.

Several days ago while sitting quietly before God, He impressed upon me a thought that has captivated me since. My father's ring has a another deeper meaning. Over the last several years God has taken me on a journey of the discovery of His daily presence in my life. Moment by moment he is always there with me. I am never alone and His fingerprints of work have been noticed and highlighted by the practice of awareness. What He showed me in that quiet time of solitude was a symbol of His presence - my dad's ring.

While the marital ring symbolizes the presence and commitment of my relationship to Julie, the ring from my father symbolizes the presence and commitment to my heavenly Father. By wearing the ring each and every day, I have a visual reminder of God's walk with me in life. Each day I have been wearing the ring from my dad I am reminded to be aware of what God is doing and His commitment to me.

"I will never leave you nor forsake you." Hebrews 13:5
"I have loved you with an everlasting love." Jeremiah 31:3

He is Lord of my earthly marital relationship and He is Lord over my heavenly relationship.

He IS Lord of the rings.

The Wedding Zone

In a world surrounded by living together and co-habitation in the place of marriage, there exists a place where marriage dreams take the shape of excitement and planning. Filled with flowers, gowns, photographs and signup sheets, the South Hill Mall in Puyallup became such a place. The young couples traveled from place to place amidst the music and atmosphere of anticipation for an upcoming marriage. Here in center court there was such a place where marriages still can happen.

Welcome to... the Wedding Zone.

Last Saturday I found myself planted in the center court of a mall as one of 28 different vendors all with something to contribute to wedding couples and parents. The vendors represented just about every aspect of wedding planning: Photographers with their huge photo shots in frames and thick books of artistic examples; Tux and gown shops with books and books of possible choices; Caterers with cuisine selections to curb the appetite of the simple or elegant; A Flying Tomato mascot for the kiddies; Vocalists singing as example of their artistic contribution of love songs; A horse drawn buggy to go to and leave from the church in style; A wedding fashion show with all the latest styles for an up-to-date wedding; There was even a liposuction booth to get that instant buff look without all the sweat of dieting and workouts....soooooo 2010.

In the midst of all of that was my little booth as a wedding officiant. Some would ask, "What is a wedding officiant?" That question alone reminded me of how the ceremony itself and the importance of the words and vows have all become secondary to the spectacle of the exteriors. Relational preparation in learning the tools of how to make a successful marriage is not a priority on the financial list of investments for that perfect ceremony. Yet, long after the pomp and circumstance the realities of learning to live together with a marriage commitment suddenly take front seat. The value of learning relational skills takes on more importance. My services of pre-marital counseling and performing the wedding ceremony seemed insignificant to most couples, yet the spiritual connection and foundation is worth all of this "stuff" put together.

It seemed surreal and yet symbolic that my little booth was in the middle of all of this white lace and promises. I felt like I needed to arrive at future weddings as the officiant in a horse drawn buggy and then sing the ceremony wearing a white suit. I could also then be the entertainment at the reception doing the boogie or singing with a band in concert. Instead my services look kind of vanilla in comparison. I did pass out lots of information cards and talk to some interested couples. But the mall marketer told me that they have been doing this wedding fair for years and there never has been a wedding officiant as part of it. Wow.

It gets even wierder.

Next to my booth was a vocalist whose name was J'Lynn. Her name seemed interesting so I asked her the story of how she got her name. She told me that her twin brother died at birth and her parents were going to name him Jeffrey. So in honor of him, she was named Jeffri Lynn and then shortened to J'Lynn. So here we were, two Jeffry Lynns right next to one another...one a male and the other a female...our total names both contained 20 letters... I'm a pastor, she's a pastor's daughter...

I look around the center court and suddenly the value of what I contribute to weddings doesn't seem as vanilla anymore. In fact as the room spins around, it is in reality the most important vendor table in the entire room. I imagine the room filled with pastors and counselors and crowds of young couples seeking help and counseling. Most of their resources are spent on seminars, marriage mentoring, books, and retreats...

You've been visiting ...the Wedding Zone!

(You can also visit my wedding website at www.beingusweddings.com)

Finding the True Self

The true self is the exact opposite of the false self. The true self is who, in reality, you are and who you are becoming. It is not something you need to construct through a process of self-improvement or deconstruction by means of psychological analysis. It is not an object to be grasped. Nor is it an archetype to be actualized. It is not even some inner, hidden part of you.

Rather, it is your total self as you were created by God, and as you are being redeemed in Christ. It is the image of God what you are - the unique face of God that has been set aside from eternity for you.

We do not find our true self by seeking it. Rather we find it by seeking God. In finding God we find our truest and deepest self. The anthropological question (Who am I?) and the theological question (Who is God?) are fundamentally inseparable. It is by losing our false self in God that we discover our true identity.

There is no true life apart from relationship to God. Therefore there can be no true self apart from this relationship. The foundation of our identity resides in our life-giving relationship with the Source of life. Any identity that exists apart from this relationship is an illusion building up the false self.

Fall Emotions

Fall smells and sights are engaging. The colorful panarama of leaves against the backdrop of blue skies and distant mountains paints a picturesque scene that triggers emotions in me. The smells of burning leaves and fireplaces; the sounds of football games; the taste of pumpkin pie; and stacks of straw transform me into another place and time from the past. Have you ever wondered why such now moments ignite memories and emotions that are tied around them?

Whether we like to admit it or not observation is always affected by not only the objective but also the subjective. We bring our own perceptions to the facts - we do not simply study information and then come to a conclusion; we absorb it and come to a personal interpretation of what is real.


Take the human brain for example - when the human brain absorbs information, that information is one part data and six parts emotion. Now those facts gathered by researchers leads to a fascinating thought - that everything we remember is wrapped around everything we experience.


That means that it is not enough to know the facts of God gleaned from extensive Bible study through years of laborous research. Those facts will not stick to us as will our emotional responses to God in worship or simply walking around the neighborhood on a fall day. Our personal search for meaning is subjectively connected to a relational God.


We were created to wrap emotions around our experiences - so make a fall memory with the Creator of it all.

Resting in the Thumb Sucking Now

Two small life forms under the hand of a Creator join magically together to form a totally new human being. Inexplicably, the cells begin to divide with each following it's preassigned designation to a functioning part of a highly designed body. Skilled hands with fingers, quick feet with toes, and an illuminating face with a smiling mouth and bright eyes begin to appear. In the center of it all, the little life shows evidence of it's existence...a strong heart beating rapidly, excitedly, waiting for the day of the grand appearance.

There's movement, kicking, and stretching as the thumb of the hand finds its way to a welcoming mouth. You see, there's a calm assurance inside this human sanctuary that there is a much greater hand in control...forming every part according to His own will and plan.

There are future plans for this new human being, plans that only He knows that are wonderful and special according to the uniqueness of this person's gifts...talents that came from the fingerprint of God Himself. Thumb sucking is a sign of peaceful assurance that all is well in this unique and special development...He is in control and His holy fingers are forming and shaping...God smiles because He has a plan for this little life that is already known and pleasing to Him...a concert pianist, a teacher, an athlete, or maybe even an 747 pilot! But for now this new human being has instinctively learned to rest as the Creator continues His handiwork with no anxious thoughts about the future...just resting in the thumb sucking now...all is well.

Such is the circle of life...as my elderly mother nears the end of her time...another new life is about to enter the world.

Meet my new granddaughter...

She is scheduled to enter my world January 22...

...on my mother's 87th birthday.

A Thinking Parable

Here is the parable of two men:

Both men recently lost their jobs and began an unsettling time of job searching in a downsize economy. In an uncanny fashion they paralleled one another in their fervor to search all opportunities for work. Phone calls were made, resumes sent out, research done, and appointments with key persons conducted. Hours were spent online researching teaching opportunities at schools and pastor openings (amazingly these were the interests of both). Weeks go by and the hard work and diligence of each man was noticeable but with few results.

They both were very much alike in their actions but differed greatly in one area: Their thinking.

The one man was driven to work long hours because of fear - fear of failure, fear of being discovered as a nobody, fear of being known as a person who had an empty and futile life anchored in status and accomplishment. He was consumed with himself and his own status. He was worried about the future and what would happen to his family.

He was a deficit thinker.

The second man anchored his search in a relationship with God that began each day with solitude and centered throughout the day on awareness. He saw God in each "rejection" and His hand on each appointment. God was at work in proving His presence and care in every step of the journey. His life was one of being at rest... of seeking ways to serve others. He was full of drive but not driven. He was enjoying this special time of trust and faith because he saw God even in the liminal places of life.

He was an abundance thinker.

Two men both facing the same obstacles with the same fervor...but both completely different in their thinking. The abundance thinker had a totally different mindset because he saw himself from God's perspective. The only limits he had were the limits on him to help him grow in faith and glorify Him.

The thinking factor that made the difference? A growing relationship with a real God that transcended books and ideas and permeated thoughts and life. It's relating to a God holding a hand through good and bad times to color perspective on the larger scope of living. It's seeing God's fingerprints on the now. The fears still linger but the largeness of God is growing.

My parable is a real life story...I choose abundance and the peace of trust.

Born Again Today

A person who genuinely honors the teachings of Buddha or the beliefs held by devout Hindus understands that reincarnation is a cycle that must be broken or at least completed. To be reincarnated is not a gift but a declaration that you have not lived your life well enough. The ultimate gift in Buddhism is to complete the cycle and move to nothingness, the end of you. A part of this process is the end of all desire. In this system a person's only hope is to live out this life so that things might change in the next. This is one reason why reincarnation is not acceptable to me.

Jesus offers something quite different. If you know in your gut there's something broken, something missing, something needing to be changed, you don't have to wait for this to begin taking place in your life. Jesus promises you can be "born again" - be given a fresh start in THIS life. This is in contrast to the premise of being born again, and again, and again on a luck-of-the-draw cycle of desperation and futility of this world belief.

Reincarnation makes no distinction between being a human and an insect. It's funny how oftentimes Christianity is seen as more judgmental and less forgiving than either Buddhism or Hinduism, yet we overlook the fact that this belief system accepts without blinking an eye that billions of souls at this moment live in the state of being roaches.

If this is true, there are more of us who are sewer rats in New York City than there are brokers.

But I am not a sewer rat or insect...I am God's unique fingerprint of humanity imprinted with a soul that can enjoy forgiveness, grace, and a personal relationship with Him for eternity... beginning today!

Tweetys and Puddys

Recently on one of my exhilerating walks with Julie we came across a small helpless little bird on the ground. It was obviously a baby tweety that must have fallen out of its nest. As I walked up to it the tweety bird followed me with eager eyes and then when I moved my finger close to its head, the chick opened its mouth wide expecting food. He followed me everywhere as if I were the surrogate mommy. I though how helpless this tweety was on the ground without its mother...somewhere there was a "puddy cat" just waiting to pounce on it. Tweety birds have a natural instinct to bond immediately with their mother and if one is not around other "puddys" are waiting to step in eagerly and take advantage of its vulnerability.

When we first enter in a relationship with God our natural instinct is to bond with Him. Unfortunately we let other puddys take the place of God, some bad and some good. Puddys, like church, people, or my job, can become my surrogate bond in which I seek my daily nourishment and identity and "Mommy God" is left as a distant backup or add on. Helplessly we bond with whatever forms our personhood, feeds us and takes care of us. New believers greatest need is to bond with Mommy God not the church, a program, another believer or small group. The bonding process must start early for the new tweety in order to avoid the trap of life's puddys and develop its unique identity rooted in mommy. I wonder how this concept would change discipleship in the church today?

I think I saw a puddy cat...I did, I did see a puddy cat!

Gut Check

I am an insignificant speck of dust in the midst of a vast cosmos. I'm an evolutionary tragedy, a gnat with self-awareness headed straight toward the windshield of inevitability. All life holds for me is splat and it's all over. But what about all the people I've come in contact with and had a positive influence in my life? Don't they give me significance? The truth is that we all live in this illusion together so when people tell me I'm significant, they are living within the same illusion. I affirm others as important in the hope that I will be affirmed too. But we are all deluded by the same drug.

Maybe we should all come to our senses and wake up and see the truth...we live, we work, we die.

All of this is true if there is no God.

Maybe you can't prove God in a testube, but you can find Him in your soul. When He is missing you can feel Him in your gut.

Time for a gut check.

The Breath of Living

The Hebrew imagery in the Bible is that I was created out of the breath of God. There is something very intimate about one's breath. Each day when I breath in and out I am reminded that my life is a gift exhaled by the Creator. This is central to the human existance - humanity is all about breathing in life. When I stop breathing, I stop living. When my face is next to my wife's and we are so close I can feel her breath, the intimacy of those moments underscore the love of relationship we have. God is breathing on me daily with a new life to live in a closeness of relationship that underscores my specialness and uniqueness to Him. That makes being me even more special because my life is a gift from God to others.

There are always those tough days when I don't like myself or my life. It's on those days I think God had bad breath when He breathed on my worthless existence!

Yet, instead I ponder that God is breathing on ME today...I will CHOOSE to drink in each breath with the joy of living...I will CLAIM the wonders of being human...being me!

Do You Know Who You Are?

We truly come to know ourselves in the context of others. The more isolated and disconnected we are, the more shattered and distorted our self-identity.
We are not healthy when we are alone.
We find ourselves as we connect to others.
Without community we don't know who we are.
Have you ever watched the early stages of American Idol - you know the part where unimaginably untalented people audition for the show? Have you ever wondered whether it's really possible that a person could be so unaware of a lack of talent? How could a person be twenty-four years old and not know? Didn't anyone ever bother to tell them? Wouldn't it be the loving thing to do? Yes, and that's the whole point. In a health context of loving relationships we come to know ourselves.
When we live outside of healthy community, we not only lose others,
but we lose ourselves.

It's All in a Name

The despair and sense of loss by the close friends of Jesus must have been overwhelming. Just a week before as Jesus entered Jerusalem in triumph it seemed that all was going their way. Hope was about to become reality and their intense struggle against the Roman regime was about to break free. Then it all came crashing down culminating with the brutal death of their hero. After enduring the pain of His death someone stole Jesus body - what an insult. Mary sat crying in the lowest moment of feeling alone and unloved. Jesus had loved her even though society had considered her an outcast. In the midst of her dark night a simple word changed all of that - "Mary". When Jesus spoke that word to her is was personal and caring. He appeared to her and His love touched her personally through the simple speaking of a name. Of all people He would appear to her, an outcast, in this manner. The hope is alive in my world of despair. When all seems to come crashing down and my hands cannot refashion my world and my sobs of despair cry out to a God who seems to have left me - He simply speaks "Jeff". Hope is restored because He has never left me. It is I who have left Him. That sweet name He remembers means He cares and He WILL carry me through the night into the morning of hope. That simple word, "Jeff" makes the world right once again.