The Main Thing

All my life my attitude toward God, the church, and religion in general has been apparently distorted. After 56 years of "religious" service, I've realized that everything spiritual in my life has had to pass through a doing stage in order to give me the kickback I so much have desired...that of feeling accepted by God as "spiritual." In the process, my doing had become the focus and laid the foundation of my perceptions of who and what is religious verses what is not religious. I've lived my life on the circumference doing the old "rope-a-dope" with God. I do...I feel better because God likes me...then as a result I must be spiritual.

I'm not just talking about going to church or teaching a class or participating on visitation or even mouthing my prayers both private and public. Those circumference activities have greatly clouded the main thing. In fact, the main thing has many times been lost and set on the shelf along with many books I have collected but never read.

Doing the same old mundane becomes dull and boring, so on the circumference I'm always looking for the next great "doing" spiritual activity. Then as that becomes the main thing, I again become uninterested and in cyclical fashion go round and round on the edge of the circle of life still dissatisfied.

I have found even in my relationship with God that the spiritual disciplines can so easily become the main thing. I read the Bible according to my daily schedule; Pray to Him unraveling my laundry list of wants and needs; Practicing the liturgy of the Daily Office at a set schedule; and sing about Him in worship to lift my own spirits. Meanwhile God sits in the chair nearby as a spectator.

Daily I pray for my needs for a job and then go out and work hard at my doing with the hopes of accomplishing the task at hand. I then pray God's blessings on my efforts. He continues to sit by patiently.

I have become the central focus and the main thing through my disciplines and piety. I am looking for help for me which is not the "real" main thing. He waits calmly nearby.

Jeremiah had a different approach:

"I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion; therefore, I will wait for him." Lam. 3:24

There it is in one short snapshot of reality...God is my portion...He is all I need...He is the main thing. My doing can murky up the waters of God as my portion. I get sidetracked and miss the main thing.

Sitting before Him on a daily basis is not supposed to be about me...it's a focus on Him. If I never pastored again or served in full time ministry, would it be enough for me to have Him as my portion? If all of us had to lay aside our dreams, aspirations, and goals in order to replace them with just God - would we be content?

The reason He is enough is succinctly described in the two verses before this one. In the midst of doubt and trouble and affliction Jeremiah reminded himself:

"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. they are new every morning: great is your faithfulness." Lam 3:22-23

The truth is that all my doing has been replaced with God's doing. He is all I need...not God's love...or even His mercy...but God Himself. He is the main thing.

Therefore I can do the undoing thing - wait.

Contentment 101

This morning I am sitting in a classroom ready to be schooled by my personal teacher. No, I'm not at the University of Washington or Seattle Pacific University or Washington State...but I am in school! When I graduated from George Fox last May I thought that possibly those days were over...that the years of papers, and exams, and reading required books were a thing of the past. And yet this morning once again I am back in school....the school of doing life.

You see, my life is a classroom setting with one basic subject and one Master teacher. In fact I have found Him giving me daily lessons complete with tough exams and poignant evaluations. So here I am in school again today ready to face a tough teacher and an even tougher self.

The classroom curriculum...Contentment 101...the Master teacher...God Himself.

Paul wrote in his letter to Philippi that he had "learned to be content whatever the circumstances." So today I have done some gut checks on my learning curve by asking tough questions like a good student:

Is God Himself enough for me in the now of my life?
Are His current provisions enough?
Am I postponing my joy and contentment until I obtain a future ministry job?
Will job security give me that contentment and joy?

Tough questions but then again Paul said that contentment is a learned process. In fact I can live a godly life and not be content (check out 1 Timothy 6:6). I can be busy with ministry and godly living as a replacement for God Himself. The same question returns...is God truly enough?

The learning curve is simple...contentment is the art of adjusting to life's daily ups and downs with my attitude. And attitude is adjusting the volume of what I hear from God in life and the focus of what I see Him doing in a daily awareness of his fingerprints on my personal circumstances. So when Paul said "I can do all things through him that strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13), he's not talking about a universal promise that I can do anything I want or desire and then He will give me the power to do so. For example, I CAN get back in full time ministry because He promises to rubber stamp it will His strength.

Instead He's talking about doing a life of contentment (living life with that attitude) because of a reliance on God's strengthening presence. I CAN do life with contentment because of His presence and care. That includes contentment with unemployment and financial insecurity and job rejections and getting older (56 in December)...and the Detroit Lions losing! Wow...what a tough class!

So if you will excuse me, I have to get back to the books again of Contentment 101. I still have SO much to learn.